How long until you're divorced? And are there other issues (children, property settlements) that could be affected by seeing this man now (rather than later)?
Posts: 225 | Location: Richmond VA | Registered: 22 December 2006
You'd better be a little discreet for the first 90 days after you sign those papers. Otherwise he'll be contesting the thing and swearing you were seeing the guy before the divorce. You've waited for however long, another 90 days won't matter. Maybe he'll get a girlfriend and won't pay a lot of attention to you, then you can stat with the new guy. Word to the wise, rebound people don't usually last too long.
Originally posted by bree1604: ok, I've had this sexual attraction to my husbands best friend. Since we're married, I always ignored it and so did he. Now, me and my husband are fixing to get divorced and he finally told me how he felt about me and I told him. It's like I'm a kid again. Everytime I talk to him on the phone I get butterflies in my stomach and chills. Everytime he says something towards getting into bed, I get excited and nervous at the same time. I'm fighting with really wanting to be with him but I'm still married. The relationship is over, but I think I would feel bad after. I don't know what to do. I catch myself smiling thinking about him. I'm happy again, and I'm still married, for now. HELP
Is your husband aware of your feelings and relationship with his best friend? Who are you referring to when you say, "Now, me and my husband are fixing to get divorced and HE finally told me how he felt about me and I told him.? Who is HE, your husband or his so called best friend?
Another thing, men always love what they can't get. See how the guy acts when you are available. While you are taken, they don't have to worry about commitment. Things change when you are single. Then you are like every other woman.
This sounds so sophomoric as to be sickening. Act like a grown up. You are JUST NOW "fixin" to get a divorce. Give yourself some time and find some dignity. Please tell me you are capable of living for a few months WITHOUT A MAN!!! If this guy is so great and really likes you, he can wait. If not - you aint lost nothin. Most importantly - grow up.
"The middle of the road is all of the usable surface. The extremes, right and left, are in the gutters." —Dwight D. Eisenhower
Posts: 5146 | Location: Colbert Co., overlooking the river. | Registered: 19 January 2007
Ok, I know the original post was confusing and sounded really bad. The problem is, I was in a bad relationship. I felt awful about myself. Then, along came a guy who treated me nice, complimented me, paid attention to me. I got sucked into it. Luckily, I woke up. I need to finalize my divorce before I let anybody sweet talk me. I was really vulnerable and almost made a huge mistake. Thanks for all y'alls opinions.
Men will also tell you you're beautiful if they think you have a sizable paycheck.... though I guess many women are guilty of that same kinda thing.
Whatever happen to 'for better or for worse' and doing the best you can do together. And being happy with that as long it actually is the best you can do, and you truly love each other.
Free rides not available here!
(I know this is a little off topic, but I felt an emotion to express it)
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel..." ~Maya Angelou~
Then, along came a guy who treated me nice, complimented me, paid attention to me. I got sucked into it.
This sounds like something Ive heard before......tread lightly sis! You have many years ahead of you in life, dont just jump off the boat until your sure you cant fix the leak!! Call Kent Brand at A Family Matter, he's in the book. Great guy, didnt help my marrage much but helped me personally.
Posts: 628 | Location: Sittin by the creek | Registered: 16 November 2006
*whispers to self, there's got to be one good one left that is meant for you*
*sigh*
Back on topic...
Marriages are not made in heaven, they are like a fine piece of porcelein that must be taken care of and kept in a safe place... too much moving around and you get chips and possible breaks... hindering the porcelein worthless. Believe me I know.
If everyone went into a marriage thinking about it like this everyday... there would be a lot less divorces and unhappy people in this world.
Bottom line is... who wants to grow old alone?
*rambles*
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel..." ~Maya Angelou~
